None of us are born wig wearers. It’s a learning curve for everyone. If you are in the early stages of hair loss and trying to make the big leap to helper hair, there are fears. Sometimes we just need a little push to get on with things.
The top big fears, those most reported by new wig wearers or those who want to be:
1. People will notice that I look different and what do I say? This is a very personal question because there is no one answer for everyone. The short answer is yes, people will notice, so be prepared for questions and comments ahead of time and you will feel less stressed about any encounters. If you have had a lot of hair loss and many have seen that, and now you go with a wig, yes, people will likely notice. What you say or don’t say is up to you. If you have early-stage hair loss but know there will be more and you are now at the point of getting helper hair then some may not notice if you stick to your current style and color.
2. Oh no, will I always have to wear helper hair and be stuck with this style? This is a difficult one because some people will regain their hair, but a lot of people won’t. Those of you who know that your situation is such that yes, now you must come to terms with this hair loss as a permanent thing, it’s a leap into the unknown. But no, you can change wig styles and colors just like you did with your bio hair.
3. Commitment! Taken from number two above and going further, once you commit, realizing it is an ongoing one—that can be scary. Wearing helper hair will be part of your life now. If you need help in dealing with that, there is help out there for you.
4. How will wig-wearing affect your life? Can you still do the things that you want to do? From swimming to riding a roller coaster, this question comes up a lot. In most cases, with some modifications, you can still go about your life as before. There are also many helpful articles, videos, etc., about this topic.
5. The cost: Yes, there are expenses for the topper or wig, the accessories, and the products required for maintenance. In my experience looking at cost, I found that I spent just as much at the hair salon before when averaged out over a year. Unless you go crazy with buying a lot of wigs (which I don’t recommend until you learn which wigs work best for you), the cost should not be that different if you had regular salon hair care.
6. Help, where do I start? That is the big question always. It is not uncommon to feel overwhelmed. Again, I urge you to reach out for help. There are wonderful articles, helpful videos, and a great customer service team waiting to help you. You are not alone! You will be amazed at how many people wear helper hair.
7. Nothing will ever be the same. These words can have many meanings, and if we stop and consider that we can say these words every day about life in general. Each day brings a new reality. We are another day older, another day wiser if we’re lucky, and we adjust. Accepting your hair loss and embracing the help that is there for you will make all the difference in how you see your days going forward.
8. One foot forward, one step at a time. It’s Lean in time! You can’t stay half in and half out forever. There will come a time when you must get out of the house with that wig or topper that you bought and are afraid to wear.
Most women have experienced facing fears, lots of them. We deal with judgment, discrimination, relationships, job pressures, health concerns, aging, and maybe marriage and children. At different points in our life, we had fears about all these things, but we kept stepping forward. This is just one more thing to step up to, over, or around, and claim another victory for yourself.
Leave your fears behind and know that all that time you spent in front of the mirror moving your thinning hair around, trying to conceal the issue, worrying if people could tell, is now a thing of the past. Be kind to yourself as you go through the learning curve. Don’t expect to learn everything in a day or even a month. But you will learn, and you will find the vendors you like best, the fibers and wig caps that you prefer, and the colors that work best for you. It’s a process and can be fun, believe it or not. In the end, you will save time, money, and stress. You will wonder why you didn’t do it sooner!
Wishing you a happy new hair day, and new wigs for autumn and winter. I bought Portrait Mode in shaded Cappuccino, and it may be my favorite yet.
Until next time,
If you are like me, you have said multiple times during your wig journey, “oh, this is the one!” The falling in love with a wig process: After deciding on a color or two, the kind of cap that makes us happy, and a style or two, then we look—and look. We fall in love. There is no cure for it. But the magical thing about wigs is that even those you look at when you get it home and say, “hum” and you may put away—by some miracle when you get that wig out months later, you fall in love over again.
What makes us fall in love, out of love, and back in love with our wigs? No one knows, or if they do I wish they would tell me! I do have a theory though. It’s when magic meets reality, and we see that wigs just like people have flaws, but we love them anyway. Yes, we love them because they give us a new version of ourselves. We can be who we want to be. We can look casual, sophisticated, sporty, sexy, and everything in-between and in multiple colors. Never mind that there are the little hairs flying around on top, or that those long, beautiful styles that clump or frizz on the ends due to friction, make us cry and say naughty things. Yes, maintenance is a big deal on some styles. But if you love it, it’s worth it.
How much maintenance is required can make us love our wigs a bit less or a bit more. Yes, there are many things to consider when buying a wig, and the cost is just one of them. I try to think one thing: will this wig make me happy when I wear it, and let me forget that I’m wearing it? That is a big deal for me. I don’t want to go through my day wondering if my wig is secure if it looks “wiggy” or deals with a cap that is irritating. Love for me is more complicated than just how I look in the wig. It’s how I feel in it, and how comfortable I am in it in every way.
Maybe we need to be a bit more realistic about wigs and the maintenance thereof. There is no perfect anything, and that includes wigs. We make our choices based on many criteria, and we all know those. Cost, cap, style-length, color—and then do we think of maintenance? I admit that I did not think about it at all when I first started wearing wigs. I learned the hard way how important it is.
I love my wigs and I am truly grateful that there are so many to pick from these days. My attitude changes when I put one of mine on and get ready to go out to see the world. I know the world will be seeing me. I look in the mirror and see who I want to be, and that is worth a lot. Because I am happy and feel secure with my choice, I go about my day feeling confident, and that can make a difference in one’s day.
But to get back to the topic, the question at the beginning—of course, there is not “the one” at all. There are many and we have enough love to go around, right?
Thinking about those fall styles yet?