Accepting Your Hair Loss
Wig Shown Above: Jazz Monofilament Wig by Jon Renau in color 6F27
I’d venture to say that no one would pick losing one’s hair as a great way to test our confidence or self-esteem. But if it’s happened to you, know that the way you choose to deal with it can make all the difference in your mood, outlook, and relationships with others—and your confidence level. Choose to be confident!
That first day out the door to face the world with our first wig can be exciting, terrifying, anxiety producing, or all of these things at once. But the day will come when we must take that big first step. We can’t hide from the world forever. We must put ourselves out in the world and do it with confidence. If we stay in the denial or anger stage, we run the risk of not taking advantage of those things that can help us—like wigs. We also run the risk of not getting on with our life. We don’t want to give over—not even one second of our life, to fighting a battle that we can’t win. So, if you know that your bio hair is gone for good, or at least to the point that you don’t feel confident about how you look out in the world, know that you have options.
Also, we can’t hide from the fact that there is a psychological impact from hair loss, like any other loss. We must give ourselves time to work through that. But to linger in the stages of grief too long can be harmful. The final step in any grieving process is acceptance.
- Your Prospective: We’ve all heard it before—we are our own worst critic, and it is definitely true – you are likely harder on yourself than you would allow anyone else to be. This also means that you probably view your hair loss more critically than others do.
- Your Feelings: It takes a little time, so don’t be too hard on yourself. Learning to live with your hair loss is a psychological challenge, but it’s only as difficult as you make it. However, we need tools to deal with this loss.
- Your Solutions: Find help if you need it. Most of you who read this have long since gone to the doctor and you know all about your hair loss, but now you need a different kind of help. You need help from people who know about wigs and wig care. You need to find others who are dealing with this—you need support from those who can understand.
- Your Options: If you are stuck in the grief cycle, and just can’t gather your courage to step out the door with a wig for the first time, there are professionals who can help. Don’t write off your pain because you are afraid of being seen as weak. Issues with anxiety, depression, and low self-esteem can impact your mental health (and physical health) both in the short and long term.
We may not have a choice about losing our hair, but we can choose how we respond. We can refuse to live in denial and allow hair loss to destroy our confidence and quality of life. Getting the help that we need is the first step. Learning about wigs and how they can enhance your life is the next step and just as important.
Like most wig wearers, I had to try a few wigs to get to my happy place, but when I did it was as if someone turned the light from dim to bright. I looked in the mirror and saw me—just me, and not the wig. I knew then that I had found a style and color that suited me, and that made all the difference. My confidence began to return.
Things NOT to do:
Please don’t give up after trying just one or two wigs. You will likely feel the same as a lot of people: the wig has too much hair (because you are not used to seeing yourself with a thick head of hair), and the fit is not right. Granted, some wigs do have a lot of hair, but you should know that some have a lower density and no permatease if that is what you like best. In other words, don’t make quick decisions. There is a wig cap learning curve as well. Did you measure your head? Do you know about the difference cap styles/construction? Also, know that it will take a while to get rid of the feeling that something is sitting on your head.
Don’t think that you will look like the wig model. Have realistic expectations. Your face shape, coloring, age, may or may not be the same as the models. Even the length of your head and neck might be different, causing the wig to look longer or shorter on you than the model.
Don’t be afraid to put your hands in and on your wig. This can be tricky because you don’t want to mess up the “factory part” if there is a chance you might want to return the wig. But, if you know you like it and will keep it, get in there and style it. Very few wigs come right out of the box looking great. Don’t be afraid to use the proper products on it to make it your own. Put clips in or wear a headband to add an even more realistic look. There are tons of great WigStudio1 sponsored videos that will help you achieve the look that makes you comfortable. From products to security options, you can find it on The WigStudio1 YouTube channels or the reviewers' channels.
Don’t give up because you haven’t found the right way to secure your wig. And by “right” I mean the way that works for you. Different people like and use different methods. I am a “purist” in that I like nothing but an occasional clip or bobbie pin to secure mine if I go to the dentist. But I am lucky to have found the wig brand and kind of cap that fits me so well. There is no one-size head. We all have heads that can be shaped differently—something I had never given much thought to until I became a wig wearer. Securing my wig is less of a challenge than someone with an office job, or someone with small children, etc. I am an author/writer so I work from home and can control my environment. I don’t do a lot of up and down, in and out, running around, or having to be being outside in the elements, all of which, might require a more wig security than I use. So, as you can see, securing your wig is a very personal choice. Fortunately, you have many choices.
A happy ending—yes, there is one. Before you know it, you will be a pro in your own right. You will know all about caps, fibers, heat friendly wigs, and how to care for them. You’ll know which colors and styles flatter you—and there is when the fun begins. You have options! Just take a look at the website today—wow.
VickieLynn – reminding you to be confident!